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Showing posts from February, 2017

I FOUND ........

I have failed,
Not once or twice but hundred times,
I have been on opposite and wrong side of their thoughts,
I refused to satisfy their wish upon me,
Of course,
I refused to be trodden, However, before then,
I was on the right and exact place in their minds,
I was somehow naive or too ignorant, innocent,
My life was heading nowhere.
I had fallen,
I was trying to rise,
Yes I was rising,
Yet I was bent,
But still I was raising my eyes as I craved to see ahead,
I craved for hope ,
I found Faith,
I found strength,
I found peace,
I found a mightier power That always carries me through,
Each moment,
I fought fear.


A knock at the door,        another one at the bed room window;
a phone rang and she woke up.
At first,
she thought she was dreaming.
she woke up from her sweet nightmares.
She checked the phone ,
it was past midnight, precisely six minutes past one.
She was moody again.
She hates it every night when the man turned into a very familiar stranger.
She opened the door lock and headed to the kitchen ,
took a matchbox and lit the cooker and warmed the cabbages.
She went to the toilet and back to the kitchen.
The man had entered and had switched on the sitting room lights.
She looked in his eyes and saw many shadows,
She didn't recognize any of them .
she was looking for her own, it was not there neither was her face.
The stinky smell of alcohol and cigarette had filled the room
"Did the bulb burn?"he asked but she pretended not to have heard as she entered the kitchen and with a wooden spoon stirred the warming food.
He asked again.
"what happened to the bu…


It was quite a worry some day!
I thought,
The body was contacting the soul,
It has become a routine nowadays,
What is happening to us?
Emotions are rising high each day,
I ,the soul, am always suffocating within you,
The bitterness and anger ,
The idleness and indecision,
The pain and worthlessness,
What is happening to us?
It is too painful nowadays,
We seem lazy,
Of course, that is the exact word-LAZY
We wake up early  but aimless,
We then lack any plan,
We go back to sleep when others are gone,
When I get hungry I look for food and eat,
Am always tired and too emotional,
Am stuck here,
The mind doesn't seem any active,
What is happening to us?
Is it the end or beginning?
Where do we start?
I, body, am too weak!
I,soul, am soffocating!
I,mind, am lost in a multitude of useless ideas!
Let us have a nap may be we will be fine in waking.


No one will ever remember my grave,
let me be buried in a community graveyard ,
without a cross.
Let no one write a name on my grave.
I want to be forgotten,
just like Iam forgotten,
the same way I have struggled with no one to care or worry about my life.
Yes ,
I want all of you to forget I existed,
it may be hard ,
if you must remember me don't ever cry.
I existed only for nothing.
My life is finished,
done and over Iam broken beyond repair.
Anyway forgive me,
I don't know for why.
IAM with the devil now serving my eternal sentence.
Am happy my fate is already decided.
My life is over.
Goodbye everyone.


I changed,
I know,
  I feel it,
 I understand it,
I can see it,
Am not ignorant,
 Don't say am stubborn,
 No, situations in life changed,
 I was once charming with a big heart,
Oh yes,
A heart big enough to take any nonsense and a mind too slow to judge,
 I was so pure,
Of course,
 I once seemed like an angel,
With my naivety and innocent character,
 I was bruised,hurt and so many breeding wounds and scars are overwhelmingly hidden in my heart. The look,
Sometimes I don't care,
I have tried so much ,
done so much
But they call me a failure,
Nobody seems to understand me,
 I closed all doors,
 As I fear being hurt,
 I hate no one but since am always lonely inside I have lost it.
 I argue so much,
 Reason,,,,, I feel like a shadow is all over me trying to dominate me,
A shadow that cares not even a dime about me. I closed all the doors to my heart,
 How does it feel when you give your all to the world and what you get is pain A pain that nobody wants to hear about.
 I became a…


In loneliness she would tackle all the chores, Clean,mop,cook,peel,fry, But each day she strained, Searching for love in the eyes of her beloved,
Last night he was out ,
To wine and dine with his bottle of beer and friends, He ate there and then just before the birds awake he ate again,
Not the food she had spent last day cooking but the food in the bar,
She was helpless and wasted,
Why was he underrating her?
She thought of herself,
The submissive woman who had turned into a fool and a laughing stock.
She knew she had been blinded by something ,
which is not love but fear.
She thinks of letting go and boldly live her life again. She had a life ,
she had dreams,
she had guts to tackle life , She had to ignite that lovely bold character within her and fight her battles again.
He had seen her as just a vessel of no destiny He would quarrel her of his medicine,his clothes,his shoes and anything that is his,
Yet he forgot about her,
He cared less of her needs, The pain and wh…